In love and newly married, twenty-four year old Alyssa came to me deeply troubled. Each time her new husband approached or touched her sexually, she would cringe and instantly be overwhelmed with hate. The couple had been to several therapists and sex counselors without success.
Alyssa grew up in a Godless home, and was left for long periods of time with neighbors and at her grandparents’ home. One day when she was eight, while alone with her Grandfather, he pinned her down on his living room couch, and manually raped her. Screaming and fighting with all her might, she finally escaped and ran down the middle of the street until a police officer picked her up and took her home. Alyssa told her mother and father what had happened, they told her they didn’t believe her, and did nothing.
At fourteen years old, Alyssa’s fathers best friend, picked her up at school. He pulled into an alley and violently forced her to perform oral sex. Alyssa told her parents what had happened, and again was told, they didn’t believe her.
One month later late at night, Alyssa’s father came home drunk. He entered her bedroom, covered her mouth and raped her. Before leaving, he bent down over her and whispered, “This has happened to you twice before and nobody believed you…Nobody will believe you this time!” Fourteen year old Alyssa curled up in a ball, shaking and hurt, with nowhere to go.
I took Alyssa through an exercise to see if she’d disassociated during these traumas. Up popped an eight year old multiple personality. She was shaking and seething with rage. I asked the eight year old if she took the pain when her Grandfather touched Alyssa. Through gritted teeth, she said, “I hold the pain from All Three…I Hate All Men!!
I asked the eight year old if Jesus could talk to her about the hate. She warily looked at me and said, “Have Him stand far away from me! He’s a man, and men hurt Alyssa! I invited The Lord to come, He stood at a distance and said, “There is a time and place for hate, and that time has passed. If those who hurt you don’t come to Me…Vengeance is Mine.” The eight year olds hate instantly left and Alyssa saw her go with Jesus. The demons of Hate, Rape, left without incident.
It’s been eight years since I prayed with Alyssa. She and her husband have a sex life that is comfortable and enjoyable. They have two children and are debating about a third.
